So, I've already written my 'peace' for this week, but tonight I had a moment that I did not want to go unthought about. And, knowing that by next week I will have lots of adventures in Greece to report, I decided best to write another entry for the week.
Tonight I cooked dinner for 12 at my house. Don't be fooled, I don't live in the largest space, but with a borrowed card table and moving the kitchen table into our living room, the coffee table stored in the guest room, it is possible to sit 12 people around the table for a meal together. Though we've hosted Shabbos dinner for 45 at our place, this is the first time we have actually had a sit down meal, with the ability to have good conversation, not just loud moments and crazy giggles.
The size of the dinner is not the point of my thoughts. A week ago two of my classmates had a new roommate arrive. Their new roommate is not another rabbinic student, but ironically enough, is a friend of mine from the past. Shirah and I travelled together to Israel in high school on a program that brought together teenagers from different Jewish communities to talk about issues of tolerance and pluralism. Really: Can an Orthodox person and a Reform person pray together, eat together, be Jewish together. We asked a lot of questions and also goofed off the way teenagers travelling to Israel without their parents do and I believe we probably walked away with many more questions than answers.
10 years later, I am remotely in touch with at least half of the group. I know a few of us are in law school, a few studying to be Rabbis, and at least one going to recieve a M.A. in Jewish communal services. I also know that everyone is all over the place, and in many ways, continuing to talk about pluralism and Judaism in their own circles. 10 years later, tonight, I sat with my friend Shirah for the first time since she arrived last week. We knew eachother would be here, but not that we would be living around the corner from one another. We know what eachother has been doing the past few years and have been excited to rekindle a friendship, and also a dialogue, that we began so many years ago and in such an interesting venue.
We were sitting on the couch tonight and my roommate came to take a picture of us, something that most people who are shomer shabbos would not apprecite. She leaned in to me and happily posed for a picture that I am sure we would be able to match to a picture taken at age 17. After my roommate walked away I asked her if she was okay with what just happened. For the next few minutes she told me of her Jewish journey the past few years and how she is here to continue to explore. She also told me about her movements away and back towards some of the tradition that she has come up in. I recall when we first sat in highschool and talked about not being able to bench together after meals because our birkat hamazon (prayer said after the meals) were so different. Tonight, at my apartment, Shirah led us in birkat and afterwards we laughed that we spent so much time talking about why we couldn't do things together when we just did at that moment, and it was great.
So, I sit here and I think about how what I am doing here is new and how it is also connected to the many things I have done in the past. I remember many of the conversations that we had as Ambassadors for Tolerance that year we came to Israel. I remember being young teenagers and talking about how important Judaism was to us, and yet also at that same time, realizing how profoundly different lives people can live as Jews. Now, I sit here tonight and I think about how this beautiful young woman, whom I've known since a young age, happens to have journied here for this year and we are once again together in Israel and wanting to continue these discussion, only this time, the table seems easier to come to. There doesn't seem to be an adolescent focus on the differences that can so easily divide. Rather, there is a somewhat older, tired of so many divisions in relationships, and focused sentiment that we have been given an awesome opportunity. I have friends in my circles for her to come to know and she has friends in hers for me. We can pray together, have Shabbos together, perhaps I'd even go to a shul with a mechitza (separation wall for men and women sections) just to be able to experience something that is beyond my comfort zone, but with someone whom I am incredibly comfortable with.
10 years ago I came to Israel with someone who I never realized I would cross paths with at a different juncture in the journey. Tonight, we sat together and talked about where everyone is. Noam is married, Mandy has been married for nearly 6 years and is probably a mother at least 5 times, Adam is gay and we don't know what he is doing but we're glad he's out, Robbie is finishing law school and working full time on Capital Hill, Inbal is in law school as well, Kevin is two years ahead of me in the same rabbinical school program I'm embarking on, John is finishing up his masters at Baltimore Hebrew University and working towards becoming a Jewish professional, Shirah is here studying at Pardes this year, Tamara is arriving in Israel in another week to partake in the same program as Shirah, I am here doing my thing. We joked that it would be wonderful to come together for a reunion...to share experiences and continue the dialogue we started so many years ago...and then we laughed...look around, every one of us is continuing on a path and it is not so unlikely that we might be able to come together some time in the future for a reunion. In the mean time, Shirah and I will be together for many Shabbatot this year...and it just doesn't matter what divides us, because today we're more similiar than we are different.
Shabbat Shalom.
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